For the longest time I couldn't think of anything to write in this space. I look ahead to various games throughout the year and try to pick a topic based on the opponent or the Grisslies, but I was coming up empty on this one. Clayton, he's a nice guy, I'm not gonna bust his chops. Mickey Mannell? He'd kick my ass. Stiffer? Come on, that's too easy; even I can't shoot fish in a barrel without SOME guilt!
But then, like manna from heaven, I was included in an email from our illustrious President on June 5th stating that the one....the only....Dan Chiasson is back in the league and joining the Banshees. Now before you go thinking that I'm going for the low hanging fruit (that's just a euphemism) because Dan is a Banshee and not a Lucky Stiff or Grisslie, lets remember this - Danny-boy was a Lucky Stiff last year and the year before that he was a Grisslie! To me that makes him eligible for two out of every three BLOGs.
Now I've written a lot of stuff about Dan over the past 4 years. I appreciate that people who didn't start at the beginning of the BLOG haven't gone back and read all the old ones. I mean, who am I to complain, I haven't read EVERY Stephen King book. But I thought I would give you some Danny highlights. These are things that have appeared in previous BLOGs and they are ALL TRUE and have been certified by those that know.
First, some Dan Quotes that appeared in the June 10, 2010 edition of the BLOG. By the way, you can click on the date to read the actual edition.
- "Hey, he who lives by the sword doesn't bring a knife to a gunfight"
- "When we were kids, my 3rd grade teacher used to tell us all the time, "pair off in threes, line up in a circle and sort yourselves alphabetically by height".
- "Well, a Leopard can't change his stripes can he?"
- On Picking a New Nickname: "You know, you're not the only one with a vocabulary buddy! You think you're so smart because you know "words". Well I know what aggrandizing means and I most definitely CAN NOT move things with my mind! However, I think that "Captain Awesome" kind of catches the whole awesomeness of my .... awesomeness"
- "You can take that to the bank and smoke it"
- On Having a Good Arm: "Are you kidding? Does Bobby Fisher play checkers? Hell ya! So, as I was saying, the baseball gods give you POTENTIAL. Its up to the individual to realize it and use the power for good and not evil."
- On His Favourite Movies: "...pretty much anything with Meg Ryan. She had a small part in Top Gun. Of course When Harry Met Sally and Joe And The Volcano are classics! Sleepless In Seattle and French Kiss are probably in everyone’s top ten list, right? Not many people know this, but did you know that she did two episodes of Charles In Charge way back when? I still have those on Beta."
- On His Legendary Focus: "So for awhile there I was counting EVERYTHING. The number of times I chewed before swallowing, the number of telephone poles we passed on the bus, anything and everything. Once in church when I got in trouble my mother handed me the rosary. I kept flipping the beads over and over and counting. It came out to 108 every time. Another time, I was sitting in the stands at a baseball game and had a ball in my hand. I counted the stitches on the ball. 108. Tell me that isn’t destiny!"
There there was the song that Rob wrote about Danny .... The Miley Cyrus song Party in The USA that Robbie did way back in May of 2010.
He hopped off the train in Tottenham
with a dream and his glove again
welcome to the team that likes to flex, (woah)
Is he gonna fit in?
Jumped in the cab,
Here he is yet another time
Look to the right and he see the Coventry Park sign
This is all so crazy
The Grisslies seems so famous
Danny's tummys turnin and he's feelin kinda home sick
Might be after affects of the CRIC and he's nervous,
That's when the taxi man turned on the radio
and a Bluegrass song was on
and the Bluegrass song was on
and the Bluegrass song was on
CHORUS:
So he put his hands up
They're playing his song,
And the home runs fly away
Hittin' line drives like yeah
Getting' base hits like yeah,
And he's got my hands up,
They're playin his song
He know he's gonna play ok
Yeah, It's a party in Coventry
Yeah, It's a party in the Coventry
It never takes Danny boy too long to announce his presence with authority. Whether its swimming from Cape Breton to the islands of St. Pierre and Miquelon or fouling out with bases loaded Dan has a flare for the dramatic.
By the time we play the Banshees in August I'm hoping that I can fill you all in CBC Sunday Special he used to be on as a teenager down east. That's the thing with Danny; you never run of stories.
Oh, okay. I know you want it, so I'll give you one NEW Danny story. And as promised to Dan, in person, in front of witnesses on Stike's driveway; THIS WILL BE TRUE. No more lies or stretching the truth. No more taking easy and unverified shots. Everything that follows is 100% accurate.
Did you know that Dan was up for 50 consecutive hours recently? By "up" I mean awake. Let's get real. So Mr. Chiasson would have you believe that those 50 hours were all working. Its not that our hero COULDN'T work, for 50 hours in a row, its just that it wasn't necessarily the case. He was actually trying the set the world record for consecutive waking hours! And he got Sooooooooo close too! another 226 hours and it would have been his!
But seriously, if you DIDN'T know that Dan had been awake for 50 hours in a row then you've been under a rock. Why? Because he's told e-v-e-r-y-o-n-e!
Me: Dan, welcome back to the league buddy!!!
Dan: I stayed awake for 50 hours in a row.
Beer Store guy: What'll you have?
Dan: I stayed awake for 50 hours in a row.
Dan: Bless me father for I have sinned.
Priest: How long has it been since your last confession my son?
Dan: I stayed awake for 50 hours in a row.
Frank Laird: Dan can you play right field?
Dan: I stayed awake for 50 hours in a row.
You see the theme? Not that Dan's overly focused, but seriously, Danny's the second "D" in ADD. Now fortunately for us, Danny-boy kept a pretty detailed diary about those harrowing 50 hours. He was kind enough to let me use some to the excerpts.
Hour 3: General fatigue setting in. I’ve noticed no physical differences whatsoever, although I am becoming a bit more sluggish. Thinking has become a bit of a challenge.
Hour 6: Eating has also become a chore, as chewing is tiring me out. Other than that, everything seems to be normal.
Hour 7: Paranoia, flu-like symptoms, delusions, exhaustion, memory loss, detachment, drowsiness, reduced appetite
Hour 11: I’m finding myself trying to repeatedly pick imaginary things out of my imaginary hair. I’ve also noticed myself having trouble reading simple things. Certain words are morphingintootherwords
Hour 15: My eyes hurt, I’m guessing from being open for so long. Noticing some irritability. Hallucinated a car coming into my driveway a few hours ago. Hallucinated a pizza coming from the car. Ate the hallucination.
Hour 16: I’m having a hard time understanding most things when they come at me. Everything seems kind of fuzzy, the hours are melting together.
Hour 20: Objects like pens, cups and my G.I. Joe dolls are hard to hold. I’m definitely noticing that I’m starting to look different.
Hour 26: Lots of small hallucinations. Just now, I thought people were outside my window watching me, but as I turned around to look at them, they would all run away. It’s impossible for me to explain math that I would usually think was too easy.
Hour 31: Communication is repetitive. I keep repeating what I say. I keep repeating what I say. I keep repeating what I say. I keep repeating what I say. I keep repeating what I say.
Hour 33: Being this tired is like being drunk In a lot of ways. Its familiar. I feel comfortable.
Hour 33: I have the overwhelming urge to say the word "hash-tag" but I don't have any idea what it means.
Hour 39: I fall over every once in a while, I do things I’d normally be ashamed of and I think that South Park is the funniest thing that ever happened, ever.
Hour 40: I think that South Park is the funniest thing that ever happened, ever.
Hour 41: I think that South Park is the funniest thing that ever happened, ever.
Hour 42: I think that South Park is the funniest thing that ever happened, ever.
Hour 46: At this point, I am as slow as I have ever been. Or at least since I played outfield for the Grisslies.
Hour 47: I’m dropping things left and right, taking hours to eat single sandwiches, forgetting what I’m doing while doing it.
Hour 49: I actually feel pretty good! I think I've tryned the corner. I'm going to give this 276 hour challenge a real run for its money!!!
Hour 50: Zzzzzz, Zzzzzzz, Zzzzzz
THE SPEECH
Rob: Hey Champ.
Doug: Hey Champ.
Rob: There's lots of All Star chatter going on, eh?
Doug: I'll say. Sounds like not everyone is thrilled with the picks.
Rob: Yeah. I guess people are a little upset that I'm pitching.
Doug: You're not pitching.
Rob: Yes I am. We decided that back in April.
Doug: Rob, that was Aprils Fools day, I thought you were joking.
Rob: NO! I can't believe that you didn't put me on the roster.
Doug: Well you still get to captain....its not all bad.
Rob: Well, you and I both know that I SHOULD have been the pitcher.
Doug: Right.
Rob: So who did you name then to pitch?
Doug: Andy Gee.
Rob: Andy Gee. Andy Freakin' Gee. Well there's a bold pick. Didn't he pitch last year? And the year before that? Way to go out on a limb and do something outside the norm!
Doug: Look, we're not arguing about this now. Its done. We're announced and we have a full report on the team coming out in a couple of days that you proof read and approved. You can't go off all shocked now.
Rob: Fine.
Doug: Fine.
Rob: Is Neil Pendlebury on the team?
Doug: Yes.
Rob: Am I?
Doug: No.
Rob: Scott Barton?
Doug: Yes
Rob: Am I?
Doug: No.
Rob: Phil Glecoff?
Doug: Yes.
Rob: Am I?
Doug: No.
Rob: You know what I've noticed?
Doug: What?
Rob: Every second pick sucks.
Doug: Enough of this....look, I'm here to get the speech for the week. You got one yet?
Rob: Oh...I meant to talk to you about that. Initially, I was going to do one about pitching for the All-Star team, I called it, ...... wait for it ..... "Pitching for the All-Star Team". It was to the tune of Taking Care of Business.
Doug: Can't you still use it and just change it to Andy instead of you? It can't be that hard.
Rob: Yeah, because YOU suddenly understand the complexities of rhyming! No I can't "just change it to Andy." Geez. I've already put the song in the vault and saved it for next year when I trade you the Cleats and I get to coach the All-Star team by myself. Then I'll be pitching.
Doug: Okay Rob. So what's the song plan then?
Rob: Remember a couple of weeks ago when I said I wouldn't do a song about you?
Doug: Yeah.
Rob: Well, I feel kind of bad about how I handled that.
Doug: Don't worry about it, let it go.
Rob: No, really. I was wrong. Let me make it up to you.
Doug: You don't have to.
Rob: Let me do a song of you.
Doug: Really? Ok. I'd be honoured.
Rob: Honestly, its the least I can do.
Doug: So what song do you have in mind?
Rob: Probably a 70's or 80's ballad. Something with a nice melody that I can work with.
Doug: Hey, you've given this some thought. I appreciate it a lot.
Rob: You're welcome. And don't worry it will be totally appropriate.
So Rob says this really speaks to me .... I can't wait to read it!!! Hope you like it as much as he does, The REO Speedwagon song, I can't fight this feeling. . Music ===> HERE
I Can't Fight This Feeling
I can't stand this fielding any longer.
And I think its time I let Doug know.
What started as a really firm grip,
Has grown weaker.
I only wish he could play Short, like Diamond Jim Rouleau.
I tell myself that he can't hold out forever.
I said there is no reason for my fear.
Cause he's playing like an NDP back bencher.
Doug's throws have no direction,
Its been years since we've heard a cheer.
And even as he wanders,
With worse and worse eye sight.
No longer throwing like and arrow,
On a hot, humid summer's night.
And Doug's getting slower than I ever thought he might.
And Doug can't play short stop anymore.
And Doug can't play short stop anymore.
He's forgotten what he started playing for.
It's time to slam that stupid door,
And throw away the glove, forever.
And Doug can't play short stop anymore.
And Doug can't play short stop anymore.
He's forgotten what he started playing for.
It's time to slam that stupid door,
And throw away the glove, forever.
Doug's life has been such a whirlwind since the championship.
He's been running round in circles all of the time.
First Leno, then SNL on Saturday night,
That win took him places
That he'd never thought he'd find.
And even as he wanders,
He's losing his eye sight.
No longer throwing like and arrow,
On a hot, humid summer's night.
And he's getting older than I ever thought he might.
But Doug can't play short stop anymore.
I've forgotten what he started playing for.
It's time to slam that stupid door,
And throw away the glove, forever.
But he can't play short stop anymore
I've forgotten what he started playing for.
Its' time to slam that stupid door,
And throw away the glove, forever,
Dude, you can't play short stop anymore.
THE GAME
Nice song.
Jerk.
Okay, interesting game. I said before that I only write about myself when I play bad. Here we go.
0/4. OUCH! I've hit second FOREVER, but we had a scheduling issue and I had to go leadoff. I suck at lead off. 0 for 4 suck.
That aside, this game was kind of Grisslie-ish. We had some lengthy periods of good to great defense and opportune hitting. Ultimately, the game was decided in a very non Grisslie fashion with extra bases making a big mark on this game.
Alas, teaching opportunities!
We got off to a great start scoring 2 in the first, 2 in the second and then 6 in the third. After 3 we had a comfy 10-3 lead. But we prefer close games so we spotted the Stiffs a single run in the 4th and then 2 runs in each of the 5th and 6th. For our part we managed a single run in the 6th to have an 11 - 8 lead heading into the the 7th.
Farah singled to lead off the 7th, move to second on a deep sac fly by Dave Argue and would score on a Dave Doucette single. A little insurance for the bottom of the 7th.
The Stiffs would send 9 men to the plate in the bottom of the inning and score the 4 runs they needed to tie the game. The Grisslies managed to escape the game with a tie.
Barely.
New comer Tom Ball had a strong 4/4 night as did Captain Clayton Campbell.
You'll have to check out the stars to see how the Grisslies did!
Up next, the Meet the All Stars blog on Thursday morning!
Things to check out:
Check out the Donini Three Stars of the game here ==> STARS
Check out the Dislocated Joints game notes from DTBB & Terry Doucet ==> JOINTS
Check out the Tap Master's game notes from Jason Bowers ==> Tapped Out
Check out the Hurtin' Units BLOG from Jimmer ==> Hannibal Lecter
The League's Official Website ==> League
Nice song.
Jerk.
Okay, interesting game. I said before that I only write about myself when I play bad. Here we go.
0/4. OUCH! I've hit second FOREVER, but we had a scheduling issue and I had to go leadoff. I suck at lead off. 0 for 4 suck.
That aside, this game was kind of Grisslie-ish. We had some lengthy periods of good to great defense and opportune hitting. Ultimately, the game was decided in a very non Grisslie fashion with extra bases making a big mark on this game.
Alas, teaching opportunities!
We got off to a great start scoring 2 in the first, 2 in the second and then 6 in the third. After 3 we had a comfy 10-3 lead. But we prefer close games so we spotted the Stiffs a single run in the 4th and then 2 runs in each of the 5th and 6th. For our part we managed a single run in the 6th to have an 11 - 8 lead heading into the the 7th.
Farah singled to lead off the 7th, move to second on a deep sac fly by Dave Argue and would score on a Dave Doucette single. A little insurance for the bottom of the 7th.
The Stiffs would send 9 men to the plate in the bottom of the inning and score the 4 runs they needed to tie the game. The Grisslies managed to escape the game with a tie.
Barely.
New comer Tom Ball had a strong 4/4 night as did Captain Clayton Campbell.
You'll have to check out the stars to see how the Grisslies did!
Up next, the Meet the All Stars blog on Thursday morning!
Things to check out:
Check out the Donini Three Stars of the game here ==> STARS
Check out the Dislocated Joints game notes from DTBB & Terry Doucet ==> JOINTS
Check out the Tap Master's game notes from Jason Bowers ==> Tapped Out
Check out the Hurtin' Units BLOG from Jimmer ==> Hannibal Lecter
The League's Official Website ==> League
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