Thursday, August 2, 2012

GAME 20: Mr. Laird

INTRO

Holy strange week so far!  The world has gone sideways!
  • The #7 Grisslies beat the #2 Joints in the frist game of the week.
  • The #15 Cleats were in an 11-11 tie with the #4 Dodge in the second game
  • The #14 Gruesome Devils moved up to 9th by sweeping this seasons only double header and upsetting the #1 Brew Jays in the process.
  • The #13 Rusty Rebels bested the #9 Hurtin' Units. 
Now the Grisslies have the #12 Banshees and for the first time in forever we're favoured.  I'm worried about the game!

So I scrapped the whole back story BLOG on Paul Kookhaas.  You know the stories about how he's on the run from that biker gang that nicknamed him Kool "papa" Haas?  Well the stories are all true, but I'm going to have to fill you in later. 

Instead, I've decided to go with something a little more light and airy that will take my mind off the worry that is this game and maybe be more in line with this topsy-turvey week!  Rob wrote an incredible speech tonight so I've decided to align the BLOG with the speech for a change.

Today's topic is children books and their famous or not so famous authors.

By former Grisslie, TTB; Timmy Osmond.  Truer words were never spoken.


I think calling out the author of this one would be wholly inappropriate, but will see what pops up in the comment section.

Its just mildly funny so I kept it....but you have to be pretty much "Night of the living bass heads" to belive its anything more than a chuckle. 



Current Grisslie Art Sagert penned this children's favourite.  Why don't you try and go ahead and not listen to Art when he sets the defense.  I dare you. 


Author unknown, but it does need to be returned to Danny Chiasson's private library.


Word up home boy.  This book was put to together by boyeeee Tricky Ricky.  He digs anything colourable.



There are few married men claiming ownership of this one.  None that I know of course; but many of the single guys find this one funny.  Personally, I just think its nuts. 



This isn't funny.  Look at how sad that rabbit is.  Hey.  What's he drawing there?  Is that dad's weed?

Author unknown.  But seriously, only a coward backs away from delivering the difficult messages!



By All of The Farah's.  ENOUGH with the friggin' CATS!  Honestly!  Oh, and thanks for dropping by the game Michelle, it was great seeing you. 



OMG....my first rave would have sucked without this "must have" field guide. 


By Paul Piellusch, technical illustrations by Steve Ross.  Its a small group of IT savvy folks in our league; however the Beer Bros., are on a mission from God to inform the masses.


Well there's the magical "What If" questions that haunted the Berenstains and their fans forever and a day.  The kids names are Brother and Sister.  Every other character on the show had an actual name, except for them.  They were kind of the reverse of Franklin who had a name while all his friends were bear, goat or hooker.  Weird. 


By Haley Joel Osmett. He can't be far from joining the league. 


By Doug Dwyer.  You have know idea of the positive behavior influence this book has had.  I have no issues now. 


This was the original title of "Where the Wild Things Are".  However 'dropping acid' apparently sounded "too hippie" so the pulled it for a younger demographic who clearly missed the point of the book.

THE SPEECH

Rob: I've got a bone to pick with you
Doug:  Really?
Rob: Yeah.  Do you know that I haven't been one of the 3 stars9 games?  NINE!  How is that possible when I'm the pitcher and we have the lowest runs allowed in the league AND we have the leagues longest winning streak???? 
Doug:  You know, I use the 3 stars more as a motivational tool than an actual award. 
Rob:  Well, its not motivating me very much.  And if its a "motivational tool" as you claim, then how come you've gotten a star 3 times?????
Doug:  You're taking this too seriously, its got you in a foul mood.  
Rob:  Yeah, but I'll take it out on the Banshees.
Doug:   Good idea, 
Rob:  Want to know the song?
Doug:  Bring it on. 
Rob:  Mr. Grinch.  
Doug:  Seriously?  Who's it about?
Rob:  Frank Laird.
Doug:  Shut up!  He's going to kick your ass!
Rob:  Nah, I renamed it to Mr Laird and its very nice.  I can write nicely about people, unlike SOME!
Doug:  Well, lets giddy-up then!



Robs version of Mr Grinch renamed to Mr. Laird.  This is the song that inspired to change everythign else in the blog to match it.  Hell of job Robbie, this is one of your better ones.  You can find the mucic ===> here if you need it

MR. Laird

You're a tough one, Mr. Laird.
You really have a feel.
You throw like Colby Rasmus,
You catch like Willie Stargell.
Mr. Laird.
You're a tough pitcher
Who throws from a crazy side angle!

You're a monster, Mr. Laird.
You're never in a hole.
Your brain is full of strikeouts,
You've got ice water in your soul.
Mr. Laird.

I couldn't hit off you, with a
thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole.

You're a pitcher, Mr. Laird.
You have ground outs in your smile.
You're the meanest pitcher
Like Roger Clemens who is vile!
Mr. Laird.

Given the choice between the two of you
I'd rather hit of Clemens who's has less style!

You never foul them, Mr. Laird.
You've got nasty, wasty junk.
Your bad pitches are like unwashed socks
Your good ones are full of gunk.
Mr. Laird

The three words that best describe your pitches,
are, and I quote: "Stike. Strack. Struck."

You're impossible, Mr. Laird.
You're the king of sinful tosses.
That bat's a dead tomato splot
With moldy purple spots, Mr. Laird.

THE GAME

So....at the risk of sounding really "braggy", this game was exceptionally Grisslie-ish.

The game started with the visiting Grisslies scoring a 3 up 3 down first by retiring 3 pretty feared hitters in Jerry Muirhead (2/4), Paul Koolhaas (1/3, 1) and Brian Richards (1/3, 1).   The only part of this game that was un-Grisslie was that we didn't score in the 1st inning.   The second and third innings were quiet for the Banshees as they only had a single runner on base for each inning. 

In the Grisslie second we scored 7 and 3 more in the 3rd.  With a 10 nothing lead, the game was really never in serious doubt. 

But I worry.  Because that's what I do. 

The Banshees didn't give up.  They counted one in the 4th, and two in the 5th and another solo run in the 6th to narrow the gap to a manageable 10-4 after six.

The Grisslies would count 2 in the seventh to make it 12-4 and then shut down the Banshees in order in the bottom of the of the inning. 

Excellent defense in this one from both clubs and the Grisslies took over the lead as the best defensive club in the league on this night.  

Next up the Dusty Cleats who I've been worried about since the draft.  Their luck will change, of that I'm sure, I just hope its not until the week after next!!!

Things to check out:

Check out the Donini Three Stars of the game here ==> STARS
Check out the Dislocated Joints game notes from DTBB & Terry Doucet ==> JOINTS
Check out the Tap Master's game notes from Jason Bowers ==> Tapped Out
Check out the Hurtin' Units BLOG from Jimmer ==> Hannibal Lecter
The League's Official Website ==> League 

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