Game 5 - Johnny Don't Preach

INTRO

Oh good!  Another lineup that just keeps on coming!!!!  The Grisslies dodged a bullet this week when we missed an appointment with the Gruesome Devils on account of weather.  Facing a 3-1 team with our 0-3 squad was a lot to ask.  So instead we get the much softer Blues Brothers.

Ya, right. 

I had a whole 'pick on Kevin Boston' BLOG ready to go, but then the guy went and ducked us.  I can't say I blame him.  When you're hitting over .900 you don't need to fatten your stats against the leagues lesser lights.  That's big of you Radar.  Besides, I've already written plenty on Radar, so I opted to move on to another victim. 

As I go through the roster of the Blues Brothers and I see that I've already written a Cam Clark BLOG, one on Ingo, Argue and Mason.  I'm running out!

Rather than go back to the well on some of these easy stories about Radar's Glove, lefty shortstops, Norwegian heritage, legendary mustaches or X-Men school, I decided to go a completely different direction. And at 10 minutes to midnight last night I figured out what that direction would be!  I would recount .....

THE GRISSLIE OVERHAUL:
 
Man, 0-3 and facing the daunting lineup that the John's have put together? Who needs the pain and anguish?  0-3 is bad enough but here are some Grisslie Specific stats with some Blues Brothers comparisons:

• The Captains are hitting a collective .421  (Blues Brothers Captains are hitting .480)
• We're dead last in runs scored. (Blues Brothers are 9th)
• We're 3rd worst in +/- (Blues Brothers are 8th)
• Only Brad Wadden, Doris Casullo and Rick Greenfield have managed to collect at least a single solitary hit in all three games.(the Blues Brothers have 9 guys who've done this)
• We're the only team out of 15 to not have at least single player who have scored a run in every games (the Blues Brothers have 4 who've done this)
• We have no one in the top 25 of total hits.  (Blues Brothers have 1)
• We have no one in the top 50 of at bats. (Blues Brothers have 2)
• We have no one in the top 75 of runs scored. (Blues Brothers have 4)
• Only one player (Winston Gayle) who'd played more than one game has an improved batting average from the previous year.  (Blues Brothers have 5)
• We have no one in the top 60 of runs scored per hit (Blues Brothers have 3)
• We have no one in the top 50 of runs scored per at bat. (Blues Brothers have 3)

But enough of the good news. Its time for a shake up.  Rob and I trade emails before and after every game.  I'm OCD and he forgets what he types so he keeps repeating.  It works for us.  Anyway, for all our bitching and moaning about this squad, we end EVERY single email with "I LOVE THIS TEAM"!

Yep, swear to god.  The 'something' missing isn't the players....its how we're using them.  So we're gonna move some stuff around and see if we can't find lightening in a bottle.  Or as Rob would say, 'one bolt of lightening is worth two in the bush.' 

New Line Up:

• First off, the new batting order will go in sequence of averages. 
• Al Hayward
• Murray Saunders
• Rick SpringGreenfield
• Winston Gayle
• Roger Gaudet
• Brad Wadden
• Glen Tinkler
• Doris Casullo
• Gord Dol
• Dave Muirhead
• Rob Farah
• Doug Dwyer

 That should make a difference moving the weak guys to the end.  Now the positions.

• Al Hayward - miss cast at 2nd and 1st.  He'll pitch.
• Murray Saunders - Talents are wasted in CF, he can call a good game, he'll catch 
• Rick SpringGreenfield.- We need to get a comfy spot for Rick.  Until further notice he's at Short
• Winston Gayle.- Lack of mobility in the outfield, he moves to 1st base
• Roger Gaudet.- Versatile, can play anywhere, we'll try 3rd base
• Brad Wadden. - Back to his favourite position.  2nd base
• Glen Tinkler - We'll take the upgrade on Winston's arm and speed and put him in Left Field.
• Doris Casullo - We'll hope that the Blues brothers are all righties and try to hide him in Right Field.
• Gord Dol - Half of our defensive center piece in no place other than Center Field. 
• Dave Muirhead - The other half of the lock down Center Field contingent. 
• Rob Farah - Rotate through the Infield, because just about anyone can field.  
• Doug Dwyer - Rotate through the Outfield drawing on his innate ability and ball sense.  

LOOK OUT BLUES BROTHERS!

The Speech

For the music, click =====> HERE

Rob:  Oh, this is gonna be SWEET!!!!
Doug: What's that?
Rob:  The speech for this week!  I've been working on it since draft day...finally nailed it!
Doug:  Really?  That's a long time to work on something.  You don't usually have that kind of attention span. 
Rob: Attention span for what?
Doug:   Working on a song that long.
Rob: What song?
Doug: The song that you....forget it. 
Rob: No seriously, this sounds interesting.  Tell me!
Doug:   You said you were working on a song....been working on it since the draft.
Rob: REALLY?  Me?  That sounds a little out of character doesn't it?  Is it any good?  What is it?
Doug:   I DON'T KNOW!!!  You never said and then you forgot?
Rob: What?  Just like that?  I forgot mid-stream?
Doug:  Yeah
Rob: So does that happen often?
Doug:  Yeah.
Rob:  Is that normal?
Doug:  For you?  Yeah
Rob:  Who are we playing tonight?
Doug:   The Blues Brothers. 
Rob:   The Blues Brothers?  You mean the Beer Bros.?
Doug:   Nope. The Blues Brothers.  They're a new team this year.
Rob: WoW!!! what do we have now?  16?  18 teams?
Doug:   No, still 15, we lost a couple last year.
Rob: Do we still have a team?
Doug:   Barely hanging on.
Rob: And we're the ......?
Doug:  Grisslies. 
Rob: Right of course.  Named after the bear.
Doug:   No, after the award you won.
Rob:  Really?  Who we playing again?
Doug:  THE BLUES BROTHERS! 
Rob: Right, and who are these new captains?
Doug:   The John's, Barlow and Tessier!
Rob: THAT'S IT!
Doug:  What is?
Rob: The speech, I remember it now.
Doug:   Oh, what is it?
Rob:  Its a Madonna song and I sing it in the voice of Scott Mason and do it like he's singing to to John Tessier
Doug:   What if Tessier gets pissed?
Rob:  I'll tell him it was about Barlow.
Doug:  What is Barlow gets pissed?
Rob:  I'll tell him you wrote it.
Doug:  What is Mason gets pissed?
Rob:  Who's Mason?
 

Johnny Don't preach

Johnny I know you're going to be upset
'Cause I was always your little squirrel
But you should know by now
I'm not a rookie

You always taught me right from left
I need your help Johnny, your glove is deft
I may be young at heart
But I know what I'm saying

The problem you warned me all about
The one you said would haunt me without a doubt.
Yeah, my throwing's a mess, and I don't mean maybe - please

[Chorus:]

Johnny don't preach, my arms trouble deep
Johnny don't preach, I've been losing sleep
But I made up my mind, I'm better than Lahey, oh
Can't lose to Lahey, mmm...

My arm started failing me
More erratic every day
Maybe it'll be all right
If I pack on some ice

But my friends keep telling me to throw it hard
Saying I'm too young, I got no senior's card
What I need right now is some good advice, please

[chorus]

Johnny don't preach, my arms trouble deep
Johnny don't preach, I've been losing sleep
But I made up my mind, I'm better than Lahey, oh
Can't lose to Lahey, mmm...

[chorus]

Johnny don't preach, my arms trouble deep
Johnny don't preach, I've been losing sleep
[repeat]

But I made up my mind, I'm better than Lahey, oh

Can't lose to Lahey, mmm...

THE GAME

(admit it Mason, you were singing that in your head)

So Mason's suddenly wonky arm aside, we had some issues with our new lineup.  Al Hayward wasn't there to pitch.  Roger Gaudet wasn't there to play 3rd.  Brad Wadden wasn't there to play 2nd.  Murray Saunders wasn't there for his assignment at Catcher.  And Dave Muirhead, half of our cornerstone outfield was unavailable too! 

Granted, we got a few good subs, namely Bales, Dancey and Doucette.  But you're not going to waste Al at any of those infield spots when you can utilize his speed elsewhere.  And Dancey won't go anywhere near 3rd base anymore.  He doesn't even go on the left side of the diamond any longer for fear of injury.  I even saw him slow down a couple of times going into 2nd so he'd be forced out and not have to turn the corner.  Its sad really, but I understand.  But anywhere on the right side of the diamond and he's gold!  And Doucette pretty much baby sat Rob Hayward in the outfield in our championship year of 2011, so there's a definite upgrade! 

So once again, we trotted out the 'new look' Grisslies.  Last weeks return of the 2011 championship team (3 subs) didn't help.  We'll see if a Woody and a Bros. and ex-Grisslie turned undefeated Dog Catcher would make a difference.

It didn't. 

Well, that's not entirely true.  Not only did the Grisslies play one of the best games in recent memory, but we may have played one of the best games ever!

Ever. 

Oh, we still lost. 

It was a 3-2 games that was highlighted by spectacular defense at best and responsible defense at worst.  I can't think of an extra base that was given away all night. 

Congrats to the Blues Brothers, fantastic night.